County Court
- Defence Barrister: "M'lud, the plaintiff alleges that my client violently kneed him in the shin. I find it incredulous that the plaintiff claims to have never seen Star Wars. My client is known to be a fearless Jedi leader. Who, in this court today, has not heard of Yoda…?"
- Court: *silence*
- Defence Barrister: "Mr Vader, I put it to you that you brought this case in an attempt to get this court to do what your empire has failed to achieve."
- Darth Vader: "He kicked me in the shin and it hurt. I will see him punished."
- Defence Barrister: "My client was acting in self defence. Indeed he issued you a warning, one that you failed to heed."
- Darth Vader: "He said no such thing! He gave me some line about furthering his education."
- Defence Barrister: "Mr Vader, that's a lie. Is it not the case that my client clearly stated, and I quote: I am going to knee you
"
- Jury: *gasps*
- Darth Vader: "No. The attack came without warning. That's not what he said. It was more like:Uni, I am going to.
[Published: ]