https://www.whiteink.org An RSS feed of biscuits shared directly from Steve Whiting - Whiteink en-gb (c) 2026 Steve Whiting Web Diffusion Thu, 08 Oct 2026 08:09:27 GMT https://www.whiteink.org/biscuit.php?pg=497 I saw this yesterday and its meaning properly resonated with me. Thu, 08 Oct 2026 08:09:27 GMT https://www.whiteink.org/biscuit.php?pg=497 https://www.whiteink.org/biscuit.php?pg=496 - Serb: "NEV! There you are! Where the hell have you been? It's been weeks!" - PC Spooner: "Been hanging wi ma broskis, innit?" - Serg: "Pardon?" - PC Spooner: "I been chillin' wiv da man dem." - Serg: "No.… Wed, 30 Sep 2026 19:25:46 GMT https://www.whiteink.org/biscuit.php?pg=496 Can I phone yuo on an iPhone Duo? Tue, 29 Sep 2026 03:33:48 GMT https://www.whiteink.org/biscuit.php?pg=450 - Actor: *walks into the audition room, naked, sporting a massive stiffy* - Director: "O. M. G!" - Actor: "Hi. I'm here to audition for the Napoleon boner part?" Sat, 26 Sep 2026 20:33:37 GMT https://www.whiteink.org/biscuit.php?pg=494 https://www.whiteink.org/biscuit.php?pg=493 - Man: *walks up to Dyson Airblade* - Man: *puts hands into hand dryer* - Hand Dryer: *instead of blowing warm air, plays the theme tune to Airwolf* Fri, 25 Sep 2026 14:55:27 GMT https://www.whiteink.org/biscuit.php?pg=493 https://www.whiteink.org/biscuit.php?pg=492 [The fact that only a select handful of people will get this pun makes it all the more thrilling for me to publish.] Wed, 23 Sep 2026 08:41:16 GMT https://www.whiteink.org/biscuit.php?pg=492 https://www.whiteink.org/biscuit.php?pg=491 Back in August, I wrote about a collective effort, humans (AKA Meat Protocol) who work to smash the machine yet do it discretely, from within. That collective was given the name Meat Inside The Machine referencing Rage Against The Machine and adopting a… Tue, 22 Sep 2026 10:38:04 GMT https://www.whiteink.org/biscuit.php?pg=491 - Chair: And now we move onto item six on the agenda, a motion to create a new HTTP Response Code: 328 - Did I Mention That I'm A Vegan. Sat, 19 Sep 2026 18:04:09 GMT https://www.whiteink.org/biscuit.php?pg=490 https://www.whiteink.org/biscuit.php?pg=489 Save money by not having ushers at your marriage ceremony. Just ask the organist to play Groom Is On The Right by Deee-Lite as your guests arrive and enter. Sat, 19 Sep 2026 16:50:42 GMT https://www.whiteink.org/biscuit.php?pg=489 "I am only the way I am now because of the staggering amount of jam I pumped-up during the late 1980s." Fri, 18 Sep 2026 18:35:18 GMT https://www.whiteink.org/biscuit.php?pg=488 "I'm Evri woman, I've lost your package." Thu, 17 Sep 2026 18:25:48 GMT https://www.whiteink.org/biscuit.php?pg=487 https://www.whiteink.org/biscuit.php?pg=486 "May your functions receive valid parameters." Thu, 17 Sep 2026 10:03:57 GMT https://www.whiteink.org/biscuit.php?pg=486 I am, once more, reading and finding myself falling-into and buying-into Weaving The Web by Tim Berners-Lee: Hope in life comes from the interconnections among all the people in the world. Mon, 14 Sep 2026 10:24:05 GMT https://www.whiteink.org/biscuit.php?pg=485 https://www.whiteink.org/biscuit.php?pg=484 Dear Caffe Nero I've a suggestion to help you massively improve the customer experience in your outlet in Central Milton Keynes shopping centre. Ready? Employ waiting staff. Seriously. I've been standing in a queue for at least 5 minutes -… Sat, 12 Sep 2026 11:51:22 GMT https://www.whiteink.org/biscuit.php?pg=484 https://www.whiteink.org/biscuit.php?pg=483 Mon, 31 Aug 2026 17:13:48 GMT https://www.whiteink.org/biscuit.php?pg=483 https://www.whiteink.org/biscuit.php?pg=482 - Frances Spooner: "Hello darling, I'm home!" - Reverend Spooner: "Welcome home, darling. Happy Valentines Day! I've done something special, you know, that thing you said you wanted…?" - Frances Spooner: "Oh, William.… Thu, 27 Aug 2026 04:05:02 GMT https://www.whiteink.org/biscuit.php?pg=482 https://www.whiteink.org/biscuit.php?pg=481 Suggestion: instead of Rage Against The Machine, I should like to form a society named Meat Inside The Machine. An altogether more accepting bunch of humans, conscious of our role in a digital society - still just as determined to smash the machine (like… Wed, 26 Aug 2026 15:11:51 GMT https://www.whiteink.org/biscuit.php?pg=481 https://www.whiteink.org/biscuit.php?pg=479 - Customer: "I'm finding it really difficult to identify the paint finish I need. Can you help me?" - Sean Connery: "Yesh, indeed. We maintain a databache of paint colour and finish, right here, on thish shpreadsheet." - Customer:… Mon, 10 Aug 2026 08:47:39 GMT https://www.whiteink.org/biscuit.php?pg=479 https://www.whiteink.org/biscuit.php?pg=478 When ppl ask me about the origin of my crew name, I tend to show them this: Sat, 08 Aug 2026 21:21:19 GMT https://www.whiteink.org/biscuit.php?pg=478 "Order is just chaos exercising patience." Mon, 03 Aug 2026 07:16:45 GMT https://www.whiteink.org/biscuit.php?pg=477 https://www.whiteink.org/biscuit.php?pg=476 Talk about, slop music. Slop slop, slop music. Sun, 02 Aug 2026 06:48:28 GMT https://www.whiteink.org/biscuit.php?pg=476 - Patient: "Doctor, Doctor! I think I'm turning into Farfalle when, in fact, I'm really only good enough to be Spaghetti." - Doctor: "I see. You have I'm Pasta Syndrome." Mon, 27 Jul 2026 06:07:27 GMT https://www.whiteink.org/biscuit.php?pg=475 - Major Stare: "Major Look." *salutes* - Major Look: "Major Stare." *salutes* - Major Stare: "Major, lose your underwear." Sun, 26 Jul 2026 09:12:05 GMT https://www.whiteink.org/biscuit.php?pg=474 Today, I am all about the faux taupe Olly Murs. Mon, 20 Jul 2026 08:15:37 GMT https://www.whiteink.org/biscuit.php?pg=473 Michael Bublé's name means Michael breast milk. Sat, 11 Jul 2026 19:23:12 GMT https://www.whiteink.org/biscuit.php?pg=472